Is a quote still a quote if it is never quoted?

What do you use for your profile quote? Every time I join a new site, this question stumps me. It leaves me asking more questions:

1. If its for my profile page, shouldn't the quote be mine?
2. What quote reflects who I am?
3. Should it be funny, cause I appreciate a good laugh?
4. Should it be a phrase I always say?
5. Do I have to go back and change it every day to reflect my current mood?
6. Are great quotes constructed or do they just happen?
7. If I quote someone else, does that reflect that I'm a fan of the person who said it?
8. Do I want to start browsing for websites that offer quotes for a good one or just fill it in with the first thing that crosses my mind?
9. Are people actually going to read this?
10. What kind of people are going to read this? My friends who already know me? Strangers who might want to follow me? Clients who might be bothered by a tasteless quote?
11. Should the quote be a question?
12. I don't want to quote a person that everyone quotes, do I?
13. Is the quote a real quote and not a misquoted quote?
14. Is a quote still a quote if it is never quoted?
15. Am I going to be able to change this in case I regret the quote?
16. What did that one guy say that one time? That was great! Why can't I remember that quote?
17. Did Yogi Berri know he was creating Yogiisms?
18. Can I just skip this part of the form?
19. Do I understand the quote or am I just picking it cause it "sounds" clever?
20. If I make up something clever will other people quote me?

Will a Major University Please Stand Up?

The dryer had stopped. iTunes was blaring. My coffee had gone cold. The phone rang. I was oblivious to it all. I was in "my happy place." Others call it "being in the zone." Do you ever get that? I get it when I'm engrossed in a design project. One that offers a bit of a challenge, a bit of creativity, a bit of fun, and a lot of brain power. When I get in this zone, the whole world fades away and it takes a lot to pull me out. Once, when I was in this zone my son came up to me at 11 at night asking if I was going to be cooking dinner that night or if he should just heat up something. I'm telling you, nothing, not even hunger distracts me. But this morning, while I was happily working away. I was yanked out of my happy place by a Sensa infomercial.
Great. That's all I need! Don't you find it frustrating that all these companies are making money off our desperate need to look like what other people have told us to look like? Maybe I'm angry because I was pulled out of my zone, but I really think I'm angry with my own weight. I've had a weight problem for most of my life. I've been on every diet from Jenny Craig, to Lindora, to Ultrametabolism. I have probably spent thousands on attempts to lose weight. Heck, I even tried some inane Celery Soup Diet until I nearly put myself in the hospital. In the end, it all comes down to me paying a lot of money to be told what I already know. Eat less, exercise more.
That's the solution, easy enough. But nothing works and again I start some silly fad believing the ridiculous claims all over again. So I get mad. Mad at myself for being so stupid, mad at myself for not losing weight, mad at myself for not having the willpower to lose weight, then when I'm tired of being mad at myself I turn in outward. I get mad at Jack LaLane for starting the whole damn health craze; mad at the infomercials; mad at my friends for not telling me how bad I look. I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore! So, I quit. I decide there's nothing I can do and forget about it. Until, someone takes a picture of me; my mother-in-law asks how my diet's coming; I catch a glimpse of myself in a full-length mirror or reflection in a window; and the search for a solution begins all over again.

Surfing to Improve Your Brain

Image by TZA via Flickr
Ready to exercise your brain cells? If recent news reports are accurate, I'd say the answer is yes. Apparently, millions of people are taking advantage of free classes online.
According to Apple, its online store's educational section has hit more than 300 million downloads. Currently, more than 800 universities have iTunes U sites, and almost half of those schools, including Harvard University and Oxford University, offer content through the iTunes Store. Apple said that users can now access "over 350,000 audio and video files" through iTunes U. (Read more)
I've been enjoying the free online classes in iTunes for quite some time. So far, I've taken classes on astrophysics, algebra, calculus, introduction to music, European art, writing, reasoning, and more. It's FREE folks, and you all know how I love a good freebie.
But if you're not a fan of iTunes, fear not! There are many other ways to expand your mind with free online classes.

The greatest blog post ever written

I'm really bummed. Yesterday, I was away from my computer so I used the new Blogger app and wrote the best post ever written by anyone on the world wide web to date. 

Image via CrunchBase

Seriously! I'd show you, but apparently it disappeared. Or, perhaps it appeared on somebody else's blog. I'll never know. I was just double checking my blogger log, and it's not there. It's as if the post never existed at all. 

I was able to successfully post from the app one other time, so I know it was working correctly. Blogger has, however, recently been making changes to their website. The new features include a sleek look, an improved editor, access to analytics, and many more widgets. They have been slowly rolling out changes with something new every time I log in,  so perhaps I just happened to hit the publish button at the wrong time. I'm crossing my fingers that this was the case and it was a temporary glitch. Still, being leery now, I'll probably use the Evernote app or MacJournal app and write my blogs on there from now on. Both of those allow you to save your post as well as synch it with your computer.

Another reason I'm bummed is because I'd made a commitment to myself and to NaBloPoMo that I would post once a day for the month of September and have made it through all the way until now. I'm still going to count it as if I'd posted, using this post in place of the one that disappeared.

So? What was the greatest blog post ever written? Alas, that seems to have disappeared.

Note: This is the 17th post toward my commitment to writing a post a day. Have you joined NaBloPoMo yet?

Stumbleupon: 'You Have Reached the End of the Internet'

Yesterday, I was informed by Stumbleupon that I had reached the end of the internet. I backed away to reread it. My eyes not being what they used to be I was sure I was mistaken. Apparently I had already gone through all the links in my interests list and there were no more interests to select from. 

I looked at the URL. Being a savvy websurfer, I'd heard about the trick of adding  .ro.ro at the end of any link to get you to the end of the internet. For instance if I changed my website url from pastisenterprises.com to pastisenterprises.ro.ro/ I would end up at the end of the internet -- but it didn't have that suffix. It wasn't a joke. 

Restaurant at the End of the Universe

I paused for a much needed drink at a hip hotspot called The Restaurant at the End of The Universe with a couple of old friends who always happen to be there. Arthur, Ford, Zaphod, and Trillian were working on some math problem. "How can it be 42?!" Arthur was yelling over the roar of the band.  As they droned on, my mind went over my options:

• I could start over
• I could start recommending more sites to Stumbleupon. 
• I could look at the Stubleupon alternatives.

Image via WikipediaStumbleupon is a website surfer's dream. You click on the Stumbleupon add-on icon in your browser's toolbar and it whisks you away to a random website. The more you click "like" the more options it has to take you to the next time. And, if you find a really cool site, you can click on Stumbleupon's share button to show others your great new find. When I'm having a stressful moment, or need to take a break from a project I'm working on, I use Stumbleupon to change my mood, lighten up, or just to distract me. Unfortunately, Stumbleupon had decided that I was done. That's ok, maybe I do need a change. There are tons (hundreds) of other sites that allow you to bring up random websites. Here are a couple:

How Not to Run a Webinar

I attended a webinar this morning and I learned a lot. I learned how NOT to run a webinar.

It was obvious that the presenter was familiar with the topic of his presentation. In fact, all things considered the topic was interesting, the graphics were fine, and the guest list was superb. It wasn't one of those snoozinars I've attended one time or another. I'd say that it would have been a great success, if only…

If only… the presenters had been familiar with the webinar interface. This webinar was put on by a marketing partnership who used the Webex server. For those not familiar with webex.com, it's the software that lets people hold virtual meetings all over the world. There are other webinar servers such as gotomeeting.com, glance.net and freeconference.com. It's a great idea, in theory. But, webex meetings always leave me with a distaste in my mouth. It was the first time that they'd ever tried webex.com Gee, thank you for letting me be your guinea pig. I really learned a lot.

If only…the promoters who sent out the invitation for the webinar had correct information on the invitation. I have a feeling that the less technically inclined just gave up after the third try. But give me a challenge and I'm going to figure out how to solve it, or die trying. This information said to "follow the prompts" which in the end, turned out to be incorrect. You either didn't have audio or didn't have visual, its supposed to be both. Finally, I got the correct information to put in so that I could have both audio and visual connection and passed that number on to as many people as I could reach through the chat side bar as I could so that they could also get in.

If only...the presenters did a run-through with people who weren't their clients or potential clients before holding a webinar . Get to know the software. I knew the presenter had never used the software before as he said so and because he had to load it onto a different computer because it wouldn't even work on his computer. That tells you something right there. If the presenter couldn't even get it working, doesn't that tell you that the rest of us were going to have trouble?

If only…they opened up the "room" at least 15 minutes before a session began so that the participants could familiarize themselves with the interface, introduce themselves and resolve any problems if there were any. The session started exactly at the time that the "room" opened and that left those of us who were still pounding on the virtual door feeling left behind.

If only… the presenter contacted each person to make sure everyone was on board before he started his presentation. For some reason there was a group of us on the outside of the meeting that could talk amongst each other but could not hear the presenter.

If only...there weren't so many distractions. Every time someone came and went there were beeps. There was also a lot of back ground noise. If only they'd turned off the alerts and muted everyone during the main presentation. One person disrupted the whole conference when they answered another phone call and didn't realize it was being broadcast live. The presenter didn't realize, again not familiar with the software, that all he had to do was hit the mute button, but instead we were treated to a five minute conversation from one of her unhappy customers about some order that never arrived.

If only…the attendees had been told in advance how to ask a question. Likewise, the presenter should also know how to answer a question. I saw about 10 virtual hands up and the presenter never recognized them so I think he didn't realize it.

If only…the webinar presenters had read Flyte President Rich Brooks' blog post on planning, promoting and producing effective webinars.

I Think Accordions Are Following Me!

Image via Wikipedia
We've all been there. You're sitting at the traffic light waiting patiently for it to change and someone decides that the song on their radio is so good they want to share it with everyone around them by increasing the decibel volume until your fingers tickle as they grasp the vibrating steering wheel.
This morning, I couldn't appreciate the fellow motorist's gift and it wasn't because the lyrics were in Spanish. No. All apologies to Weird Al, but I have to admit it. I don't care for accordions. OK, OK, the truth? I HATE accordions. There I said it.
Come closer, I've got a secret to share. I think the accordion hates me too. Call me paranoid if you want, but the accordion shows up in random places just to piss me off.
I mean, my son comes asks me to play some Katy Perry tune he just heard so I search Youtube and instead of some great video, bam, there's a band of accordion players knocking out her latest hit on the street...
I decide I wanna read a good book, so I go to the Kindle Store, and there on the front page is Annie Prouix's bestseller, "Accordion Crimes." At least there's a happy ending. According to the review, the instrument is flattened by a truck.
I go on Facebook, and "The Creepy Accordion Woman on Buchanan Street" even has her own business page.
The driver this morning was playing a Mexican radio station that features a healthy dose of Tejano music which widely uses the accordion. Tejano music is huge here. It was popularized by Selena and more recently Elida Reyna and A.J. Castillo who've transformed it into its own genre. They even have their own awards show.
The history of Tejano music is strange enough. Sometime in the late 1800s, Germans and Poles exited Europe and ended up in Mexico bringing with them the dreaded accordion to play their waltzes and polkas. Then during the Mexican Revolution, many of these immigrants fled to Texas. Most of these immigrants were typical of the day, ranchers and farmers and their musical instruments were similar to others. Why couldn't they leave their accordions behind? They are heavy after all. Some weighing in as much as 25 pounds. Not to mention all the air it takes to fill the reeds. The accordion is an exhausting instrument. Why couldn't they leave it on the side of the road and get back in their wagons? An accordion graveyard, now that's something I'd go see.
If you like folk music, Tejano music is in itself of very high quality. But, every time the accordion blows its ugly tune, my ears shut down. Seriously. It makes me shudder. I have no idea why. Maybe its cause its so Laurence Welk? Maybe because visions of "The Chicken Dance" pop into my head.
In Far Side, even cartoonist Gary Larson agrees:

"Welcome to Heaven, here's your harp. Welcome to Hell, here's your accordion."

Looking at the bright side, I guess its good that I'm not of Polish descent where the accordion is the center of the music played at every wedding, Christmas, Easter, birthday and graduation event. I'm Scotts-Irish, and we have our own dreaded instrument. The accordion is a screeching bag of hot air with piano keys stuck to it and sounds almost as bad as bagpipes. Bagpipes! Don't get me started. The shrill and penetrating notes of the bagpipes were used because, even with the roar of the battle, they could be heard 10 miles away. Bagpipes was a call to war by the Scottish and Irish fighters and NOT romantic in any way. Read your history folks or at least watch the Highlanders and then tell me you still think you want to start your married life with the bagpipes at your wedding. If you're going to have bagpipes or accordions at your wedding, please don't invite me.
I don't find accordions sexy, either. In Squeezebox, The Who seems to imply that they're somehow sexy. Believe me, its not a double-meaning. Its not because they are having a great time in the sack. It's cause the accordion sucks! If you're not familiar with The Who's tune, its about a woman who's so moved by the music that she can't sleep at night. They even write, "the music's alright" but follow it with "daddy doesn't sleep at night." Actually, I don't even hear the accordion on the song. Is it there? Perhaps the band didn't care for the sound either. Love the song though.
If you hate accordions too meet me over at the I Hate Accordions Facebook Fan page, of which I'm not affiliated, but I'm heading there right now to join.